The Schrammie: Hollywood Edition

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Story Published: Mar 4, 2007 at 10:27 PM PST

By Aaron Kellogg

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SEATTLE - He had "The Terminator" rise from the dead.

Now he's out to persuade us that Jesus didn't.

So, would James Cameron get out of that Hollywood director's chair and come on down.

Jimmy's got this spiffy documentary titled "The Lost Tomb of Jesus."

(If you want to know when it's on TV, look it up!)

But it's not just about the tomb.

Nope. Jimmy says he also has the bones of Jesus, His mother's bones, the bones of Mary Magdalene's and, oh yeah, the bones of Jesus' son, Judah.

Jimmy claims DNA evidence lays out the whole story.

Well, that along with what I understand is an etching of Jesus that bears a remarkable resemblance to Jim Caviezel.

Oh wait, that was Mel Gibson's movie.

Anyway, Jimmy is convinced that he's right, even though a host of qualified archeologists say he's wrong.

And all this is just in time for Easter!

So, for standing on the bridge of a ship that won't float; for proving that P.T. Barnum wasn't resurrected but simply reincarnated, and for stringing together disputed facts and presenting them as irrefutable conclusions, take a bow James, 'cause this "Schrammie's" for you.

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